TGFGC

Thank God For Google Chrome.


hahaha oh!! to those wonderful "incognito windows" i just don't know what i'd do without you... speaking of that, i have no idea what i'd do without:
my mind, my friends, my family, my house, my life, my security, rules, luck, God, and without A HEART!!!
OH. i have a huge headache and my makeups a mess. i am in such a predicament... i've dug myself too deep these past years...and these past weeks, that i have no clue how to climb out. i'm falling down a bottomless pit! well... i hyperbolized that part... its more like i am intentionally and willfully walking down the path that leads directly TO  the bottomless pit to which i am referring to. which may be worse come to think of it. i am perfectly aware of the consequences yet i dgaf and do it anyways. ughgh. i am puzzling...even to myself.
so yea. this morning was late start. i didn't wake up early and study like how i planned.              i slept in instead, got ready, took nick to school. went to target. went to starbucks. went to school. ...SCHOOL HAPPENED. and um. i talked to ppl. and chilled at lunch. i felt like shit at the end of sandavol until like the end of lunch. ugggggggggg. this little world of mine is sooooo confusing!!!!! i am overwhelmed because i think too much, but do too little. FUCK.  what happened to those Disney Days? i was a princess awaiting true love and glory and happiness. where is that damn prince on his trusty steed? or at least a fairy godmother? where are THEY??? well. fantasy just took a sudden blow to the jaw, and has suffered some critical measures. i still belive in love, trust, and pixie dust...but boy oh boy... disney's got some bad timing...
and every time i try to escape i know i'm just postponing the inevitable.  all these troubles and consequences, all these fears, hopes, and regrets, they're coming with, or without, an invitation. don't they know it's impolite to just barge in??? and i know i'm lucky. truly LUCKY and graced by God. because i know EVERYTHING could be a whole lot worse. but thinking like that doesn't do any good either... i want to say so much more...but i know i am already boring everyone to death... 

i guess what i am trying to say is...

that's what i need to do. figure myself out. 

that's why everything happens and ends

the way it does in my life...