Wednesday.

So I got that challenge I had in mind...it was fun, interesting, un-delicious, funny, and passionate. But it's the weirdest thing afterwards. It's like we are actors. Totally how it feels. In the moment it's fun and pleasurable. But later on we are just...strangers. I guess that's why it works to some degree. I now know I have to confide in someone else only because these rendezvous seem like they might be hurting another relationship I have, and really enjoy.
 BUT ANYWAYS. Today I got SENIOR PARKING. WOOO! hahaha I am so glad :D  SPOT #87and then I went to ALOHA! I sat with Daniel&Kristie and Roger. ...How Awkward! Max called it "The Couples table". SO UNCOMFORTABLE.  I didn't know what to say. I do sincerely miss him, but, um. It's just weird again. After the awkwardness we got talking, and it was an actual convo...hahaha but then they left and I got to sit with Max, Joseph, and Darren. hahaha. I felt much better. Afterwards, I went home. on the way there mom was pissed. she's flipping back and forth again. and picked up pizza. and fed the dogs. and did calc hw. and did MicroEcon hw. and read Serena's blog. and...started thinking.
thinking. thinking. thinking. 
maybe I'll call guy#4 tonight and fix up tom. morning? Maybe I wont. Maybe I'll spend time talking to guy #1 and get things going the way they should be. Maybe I'll just forget about him for another couple of months. Maybe I can start connecting with guy #2 again (the way it was before everything....). I mean there are those looks we share where we read each others minds...."SHHHHH!" I miss guy #3 miserably, even though I don't truthfully know much about him. ((I don't think he should count as a guy...he was just great in the past and is one of those I'll never meet again.)) Maybe I'm semi-falling for guy#5 again? But, I just won't let go, and I know he knows it deep down, but he won't acknowledge it either... Maybe I need to stop with these guys and wait for college guys? HAHAHA. Maybe I haven't found a "Leonce" yet. HAHAHA. oh noes!!!!! imma end up drowning myself in some ocean! :O EGAD! I hope not. hahaha. 


stupid book. I didn't even read it. 


SENIOR PARKING 
      awww. but that means no Halloween costume. too much money$! oh wells.
btw. my dad's in Florida. 


btw. It seems like people have been focusing on my flaws lately. I've been feeling rather inadequate in certain situations lately... and I don't know how some people can be so harsh. Next person that points something out to me might just get something back... I dunno, maybe I feel like shit thats why I am dwelling on what people are saying and feel like I'm under attack. 


btw. I hope he  doesn't call her up and ever ask. 
btw. I HATE COLLEGE ALREADY. so much pressure and so much spam mail. i'm literally like WhereTF is this college, and how did they get my name and address? CreeperColleges.